Are you keeping up with Bridget Jones?

She's got two hot men fighting over her, a job on national TV and a bottle-o within staggering distance. Ah, perfection. And you can have it all, too.

We'd take an even money bet that, if you haven't already, you'll walk out of Bridget Jones's Diary thinking 'That's me!' (and your boyfriend will walk out thinking, 'Yep, that's her'). We've got everything Bridget-ish covered right here so you can keep being the elegant, sophisticated woman you've always been - but with the added bonus of a one-way ticket to the man of your dreams. Because no matter how much Bridget thought her life was a mess and totally un-together (alien concept that one - but do your best), there's no prizes for guessing who gets Mr Right in the end. So if you really want to get what Bridge gets, just follow our Guide to Bridget Jones’s Life…

Get your jarmies on

Don't they remind you of Sunday nights, roast lamb and Countdown? Oh, what a cosy feeling! And now you're all grown up, take a leaf out of Bridget's book and don your cuddly flannelette PJs to kill time on those long winter nights. And there's always a chance some hot bloke neighbour might drop round to borrow a cup of sugar... so not only will you look cute (man's style anything these days is the height of cool), you'll also be able to hide the instant massive weight gain from that large deep pan pizza with extra cheese (of course!) you just wolfed down. Big, baggy jimjams hide a multitude of sins. Now, where'd you put the tv remote? Get into a pair of Peter Alexander flannie PJs for about $59.50 - available at department stores and on www.peteralexander.com.au

Get good at karaoke

Office parties are part of the successful Bridget-esque lifestyle. But don't be one of those embarrassing types who makes your boss unable to ignor you due to the eerie caterwauling coming from your mic - or at least, not without getting any practise first. Try a few rehearsals

at home by yourself where the embarrassment's minimal (and maybe, just maybe, you're sober enough to tell if you're in tune). And check out www.kissthisguy.com to make sure you've got the words right before you turn yourself into the Office Laughing Stock. Again.

Master email flirting

Bridget's sleazy-but-sexy boss Daniel has mastered the art of electronic flirting... well itworks on her anyway. A snappy, cheeky email can make you look good, (even if you're a two-timing bastard) and skips the red-faced stuttering stage that we could all do without. So make your computer your new best friend... just be careful to avoid these traps:

·        'I sent an email to a guy I'd had a big pash with the night before. It said: "I had a great time last night. Want to do it again tonight?" But I accidentally sent it to everyone in my address book. Sadly, it was ignored by all of them - including the guy it was meant for. ' Sally, 31

·        'I really liked this guy and spent all Monday morning composing the funniest, flirtiest, sexiest email I could think of. But I kept minimising the page as my boss kept walking up behind me. In the end, I panicked and instead of putting my cursor on 'minimise' I pressed send. God knows what garbled, smutty mess the guy got in his inbox - but I never heard from him again! Jo, 29

·        This gorgeous guy asked me out by email. I wanted to test out my reply on a friend first. I wrote: "Rob is gorgeous - I'd shag him right now if he was here. What should I say?" I clicked on reply to sender instead of forward. He never contacted me again.' Jen, 34

Try to keep a lid on all
your romantic fantasies

Ever found yourself picturing the nuptials as well as the kids' names five minutes after you've met some guy with a cheeky twinkle in his eye? Well you're not alone, (just ask Bridget!) Most of us do it. Desperate? Over-active imaginations? Call it what you will, it's a definite no-no as far as romance is concerned. Sex therapist and clinical psychologist, Dr Janet Hall, reckons there's no percentage in it. 'That's total fantasy!' she says. 'If he thinks you've got designs on him, he might run away. So make an effort to really engage with someone - they'll feel the connection and won't be able to help liking you.' Having a mantra helps, says Janet. Her favourite is 'stay in the present' and we have to say that our fave is: 'Yesterday is gone, tomorrow hasn't happened and today is a gift - which is why it's called "the present". ' Aww, isn't that nice? Janet says: 'If your intention is to marry him in the future, your focus should be making him like you in the present. ' And she's got a point, so goon, get into it for what it is right now - and reap the rewards later.

Get outta town!

On the starting block of a potential boyfriend/girlfriend relationship? Bridget employed the age-old relationship clincher - whisking him away for a long weekend. If you're planning something similar (with hopefully more successful results), go somewhere close enough to the city, but far away enough to make you feel like you're really out of the Big Smoke. And if you ever make it out of the hotel room with your lover du jour, get him to prove his romantic mettle (ie if he can make a total idiot out of himself in public and still make you laugh, you could well be onto a winner). It's particulary effective if your Mr Darcy turns up looking jealous... Contact any travel agent or click on www.travel.com.au and getaway!

Have big pants

Why waste valuable shopping/chatting/eating/drinking time on a stationary bike, pedalling furiously in a grim-looking gym echoing with the sound of a pounding dance track when you could take Bridget's shortcut and don a pair of Granny-sized gut-busters instead. Tummy-control knickers (or, ah, girdles) have much the same effect as weight loss/toning - but with none of the effort. Genius! They hide the results of the good life (too much chocolate, beer, lapsing gym memberships), firm and flatter 'the fuller figure' and generally suck your tummy in without any danger of you hyperventilating. Just pick your times for wearing them – hot dates with men who want to get into your undies perhaps aren't the best times. But then again, it worked for Bridget - Daniel thought they were hilarious. And as the law of pulling dictates, it's only when you do wear your dodgy undies that you score -so head to nearest lingerie store and get girdled!

Throw great dinner parties

despite having no culinary skills

You can fool some of the people some of the time – but you can't fool all of the people all of the time. So if, like Bridget, you can't cook to save your life then you should avoid throwing fancy dinner parties for your mates - unless you've unexpectedly come into about one thousand dollars and can afford to get the stuff made and delivered to your door on silver platters. By all means, get your mates over, but also get them to a) bring the grog and b) bring chips and dips if they're going to insist on eating. Or, if you feel you really must prove you're a kitchen whiz and make everything from the first series of The Naked Chef, we've got one word of advice for you: don't (unless you think blue soup looks and tastes as good as Domino's). The best solution is to stock up on ready-made meals to pass off as your own creations (maybe some Lean Cuisines - then you've got extra calories to 'spend' on wine). Just remember to remove and hide all packaging so your friends don't add the word 'fibber' in addition to 'appalling cook' under your name.

Sail through v. bad hair days

Carry off your blackrot (roots in need of re-doing) and complete lack of 'styling' as though it's the hairdressing statement of the decade, just like Bridget. Because, really, it is (well, it's been your style for the last decade, anyway). And when you're being driven in a sports car to a lovely, intimate and exceedingly posh hotel for a dirty weekend with your loaded, English country gent, make sure you don't waste your hard-earned $40 – keep your blow-dry well in place with a Grace Kelly-esque head scarf. With any luck (and some painfully slow driving) you'll look glam on the way there and once you arrive at your destination. Scarves available from the Tie Rack (from$7.50-$27.50).

Be irresistible to men and cause
duels in your honour

It takes a certain level of panache to create a situation where men adore you, and in Bridget's case, fight over you. So, how on earth do you inspire that? Well, apparently, there are six things you can do that'll help you be liked by everyone you come in contact with, according to Dr Janet Hall (and they have nothing to do with your mum paying them a monthly retainer be your friend). Hopefully you'll have some delectable men fighting over your honour in no time.Try these:

·        Be funny (or just laugh a lot - people will think that you're funny either way).

·        Always show genuine interest in others.

·        Be friendly - don't rush to the loo the minute the biggest-looking bore at the party looks your way (everyone deserves five minutes).

·        Lighten up (and keep your sarky comments to yourself).

·        Plant a promise you can follow up on (like emailing them the name of the restaurant you raved about).

·        And remember that old favourite - smile. But do it with your eyes as well as your mouth -otherwise you'll just look like your bladder control problem has made an unwelcome return.

Expertly handle any potentially
mortifying situation

It's not easy getting by these days - embarrassing circumstances can befall even the most prepared ones among us. If, like Bridget, you've slid down a fireman's pole onto a TV camera and had your bum beamed to the entire nation (or something equally mortifying), Nigel Watts, psychologists says there are three steps to overcoming your humiliation.

·        Don't try to explain your way out of it - you'll just get flustered and dig yourself a deeper hole.

·        Say sorry, then immediately empower yourself by asking a question, like 'who put that camera there?'

·        Now concentrate on what you're going to do next - like how you're going to show you're super-competent when your next assignment's due.

'Course, it helps if your gorgeous, well-connected lawyer friend can set up an exclusive, world-beating live-to-air interview with the subjects of the hottest story in town. But (and here's the biggest bummer of all) this isn't Hollywood. Sorry.

15 REASONS BRIDGET JONES IS
A NEW WOMAN

Is Bridge ridgey didge? Well, if you're not sure, here's why she's our fave New Woman of all-time ('cept, of course, our Editor. Hi Sue!)

1 She hits the gym to go berko on the bike for 50 minutes (once). And then scoffs her way through the biscuit aisle of Coles.

2 She's so busy looking for Mr Perfect, she doesn't notice Mr Right is right under her nose.

Well, we've all been there - fallen madly for the witty charming love rat while Mr Nice Guy bides his time.

3 Most of her mates are 'marrieds' or serious long-termers. And annoyingly smug about it.

Sure, they've been good friends of yours for ages and you're really really happy for them. But can they stop flaunting their sickening happiness in your face?

4 Her mum's mad and wants to marry her off  'cos she's convinced, at 32, Bridget's over the hill and on the shelf. Yeah, thanks Mum. Thanks for all your support. And what on earth makes you think I'd be remotely interested in someone who actually wears the hideous ties and socks their mum buys them for Christmas?!

5 Every Monday signals the beginning of her new sure-fire diet regime. And every Tuesday night it's down the pub for too much booze and three packets of Cheese 'n' Onion chips. Followed by a Wednesday morning full of Fanta and cheese, ham and tomato toasties. With extra cheese.

6 She's constantly searching for the secrets of self-respect. And rarely fìnding them. Orat least looking in all the wrong places (like self-help books, new jobs, dangerous men and toilet bowls after a big night out).

7 She can embarrass herself without anyone else's help, thanks very much. And laugh about it later. I mean, who hasn't turned up to a Priests and Prostitutes party dressed as a Playboy bunny - only to fìnd that was next week and you're at the Salvos' lamington drive?

8 She's a Diet Coke girl by day and a wine woman by night. Well, you've got to watch your kj, haven't you? And everyone knows alcohol is fat-free (orat least it's liquid, so it doesn't count!).

9 She has raging hangovers most mornings but still manages to hold down a responsible job. Contrary to what boss Daniel reckons, she does more than just shuffle press releases about.

10 She's realised that handsome is not the only criteria. That's not to say it doesn't matter at all - when you've got to choose between Colin Firth and Hugh Grant, you can't go too far wrong.

11 She doesn't care that listening to classic hits radio isn't 'trendy'. "All By Myself" by Eric Carmen's always a winner when you've been turned down, stood up or blown out, isn't it?

12 She wants to get her life together. Hence the diary and the keeping track of every calorie, cigarette and scratchie she consumes. Does it work? Erm...

13 She does grown-up stuff like rustling up posh nosh dinner parties for her pals... And then turning the soup blue. But many a vino is drunk and all her guests have an absolutely great night (black eyes included).

14 She knows smoking, drinking, eating and flirting is bad for her... But it doesn't stop her. Enough said.

15 She's realised that staying in on a Saturday night doesn't make her boring. Well, what's wrong with hanging around at home in your flannie PJs and belting out daggy, weepy tunes using a rolled-up mag as a microphone?